Boehner: ZOMG! Climate Change Legislation Is Complicated!
While House Minority Leader John Boehner might be refraining, at least for now, from claiming that cap and trade legislation will cost consumers thousands of dollars a year, he's still attacking the Waxman-Markey bill. His latest tactic involves placing a bunch of brightly colored words and acronyms on a poster and citing it as evidence that addressing climate change is just too complicated.

"If you look at this chart, this is how this process will work," Boehner said, referring to the above illustration which outlines no process whatsoever. "With the EPA being in the middle, look at all of these different agencies that are involved. This is the most elaborate thing that I have seen and you know, I have been here a while and I've seen some pretty crazy things, but I have never seen anything this ridiculous."
Family trees are also pretty complicated, so maybe Boehner thinks people should stop procreating.
The Waxman-Markey bill does, of course, require the involvement of a great number of government agencies. But that's the nature of landmark legislation. I think over time, Boehner will find that "it's too hard!" isn't an objection that will really fly politically. But maybe I'm wrong.


















Remember the Barbie dolls a while back that got everybody riled up? The ones where you pull the string and she says a bunch of stupid stuff, like "Math is hard!" We need a John Boehner doll like that where you pull the string and he says "Writing laws is hard!"
June 25, 2009 6:14 PM | Reply | Permalink
I like it.
Also, I like the idea of creating a similar chart showing that national defense is complicated, so we really shouldn't bother with it, either.
June 26, 2009 10:08 AM | Reply | Permalink
Has he even read the stinkin' Federal Budget? I'm guessing that's a little complicated, and he's in the branch of government that writes it!
Flight schedules are hard, but we manage to have thousands of planes take off and land everyday of the year. Honestly, how do we manage it?!
Any other examples out there?
June 25, 2009 6:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
If he finds gov so complicated and difficult to understand maybe he should find another job.
June 25, 2009 8:34 PM | Reply | Permalink
Republicans have always been bad at governing, primarily because it's difficult, and takes them away from their favored pursuits, popping pain pills, banging sultry Argentinian women and tap dancing in airport bathrooms.
June 25, 2009 9:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
Cruel but fair, Dorn!
June 25, 2009 9:13 PM | Reply | Permalink
I haven't noticed that democrats are any better at governing, at least in my lifetime, so perhaps we are better off commenting on how big of an idiot Boener is instead?
June 26, 2009 12:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
You haven't? You may want to lay off the crack; I hear it interferes with your ability to notice things.
June 26, 2009 4:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
So, there are no more poor people or human rights violations and we have a kick-ass education system with federal worker protections, living wage laws and universal health care? Oh, wait, we don't have all those things.
I would say from a purely objective standpoint that conservatives are better at creating the crappy government they envision than the better government democrats keep talking about. As bad as republicans are at governing, they can't even begin to compare with democrats who can't sell the country on common sense solutions that would benefit the vast majority of citizens.
So who is worse at accomplishing their stated goals? I guess I have been smoking too much crack to tell.
June 26, 2009 5:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
They're pulling out all the stops and doing everything they know how to do to try to make people stupider, but still, their support doesn't go up.
June 25, 2009 9:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
i happen to agree with him. It is too complicated. We should throw it out in favor of a simple carbon tax.
June 25, 2009 9:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
"...I've seen some pretty crazy things, but I have never seen anything this ridiculous."
I totally agree with Boehner. That chart is the most ridiculous thing I've come across in many years...
June 25, 2009 11:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
Brother Boner's 85 Steps to Hair-care Meltdown
Does Subliminal Graphic Predict Future?
I recommend that everyone make an 11"x17" copy of that magnificent chart in the off chance that the '60s come back, you own a blacklight and ... you're on acid. Then you'll understand.
June 25, 2009 11:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
I think there's a method to his madness: in 1993, the Repubs sank Hillary's health care plan by preparing a chart which showed (allegedly) the administrative structure proposed by the plan. (The chart had arrows pointing everywhere and it looked like a mess.) Naturally, no-one knew one way or the other whether the chart was accurate, but once the media uncritically accepted the chart, that's all she wrote.
They're trying to duplicate that result here, but there are problems. First, as someone pointed out, the chart just lists responsible agencies and doesn't show how this impacts anyone. Second, I think, they've had enough laughable attempts at opposition that they're not likely to be taken at face value anymore.
Still, I think this is what they were trying to do.
June 26, 2009 9:57 AM | Reply | Permalink
Gee, the taxpayer paid how much for this guy to generate this useless chart. I suppose he wants to use something like the GOP budget outline or Healthcare outline....with circles and single lines.
Judging from his past "most memorable moments", his answer to the ARRA: "OMG" to 700 page legislation, which he didn't read!
GOP Governance at it's best: Its Too Complicated, so let's do nothing!
June 26, 2009 10:10 AM | Reply | Permalink
Johm likes to keep it simple. If he gets a par on a par 4, her writes dowm a 3.
June 26, 2009 10:44 AM | Reply | Permalink
Climate Change Legislation Is Complicated!
Well, that explains the need for the fake tan!
June 26, 2009 11:01 AM | Reply | Permalink
Next he is going to break down in tears and say: "I never learned to read"!
June 26, 2009 11:10 AM | Reply | Permalink
"so the square peg is supposed to go in the square hole, and the round peg goes...um...THIS IS A STUPID PUZZLE HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FIGURE THIS OUT!!" said John Boehner on his 12th birthday.
June 26, 2009 11:13 AM | Reply | Permalink
The agency of "Higher Prices", the agency of "Low-Mod-Income", the agency of "Free Allowances" - WT-bleeding-FUCK ??
June 26, 2009 11:14 AM | Reply | Permalink
CO2 is essential for every plant on this earth. There is no evidence that it contributes to any climet change. Please People Get Real! This Cap&Trade has nothing to do with the enviornment,it's all about our MONEY AND THEIR POWER
June 26, 2009 11:24 AM | Reply | Permalink
See what happens when you skip science class kids?
June 27, 2009 9:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
Boehner defends SDI:
http://johnboehner.house.gov/News/DocumentSingle.aspx?DocumentID=134456
Which, despite at least 100 billion spent, remains of unproven benefit. And the thinking involved is more than a little "elaborate".
June 26, 2009 11:36 AM | Reply | Permalink
TPM should find out from Rep. Boehner's office the name the individual who created this graphic.
The title presents the false impression that it was designed by Speaker Pelosi, and that it shows actual legislative elements --written exclusively by her-- as they appear in the climate change legislation.
Since this is original artwork --an interpretation of the legislation-- the designer should be forced to explain why s/he did not sign their own name or note anywhere on the graphic that it was 100% fabricated by Rep Boehner's office.
June 26, 2009 12:39 PM | Reply | Permalink
Not to mention that even if it represented something from the bill (highly doubtful), as the Waxman-Markey bill it was presumably primarily authored by Waxman and Markey, not Pelosi.
June 26, 2009 1:41 PM | Reply | Permalink
I am really tired of hearing conservatives talk about how this or that is going to cost too much, and burden future generations with our debt.
Yet Republicans rail against cap and trade because it will increase our taxes.
I assume everyone agrees that something needs to be done about global warming gases like CO2, so doesn't that mean that at some point, Americans are going to have to pay for the transition to clean energy?
If we do not pay for it now, aren't we pushing that cost onto future generations.
This whole thing reeks of contradiction.
Said much better here.
http://progressnotcongress.org/?p=440
June 26, 2009 12:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
More importantly, we're going to be paying the direct costs of global warming as well, which no one can predict.
June 26, 2009 1:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
Sadly, many Republicans don't agree with that. They have a long history of working backwards from whatever outcomes their big supporters would like to determine what science they should believe.
June 26, 2009 4:09 PM | Reply | Permalink
The Repubs can't write any legislation because they're still trying to figure out how the ink comes out of the pen.
My God, no wonder they can't figure out scientific things like evolution or global warming.
I think we should demand the creator of this alleged flow chart explain exactly how it works. If he can't, then it's not a real chart, it's just bad art.
June 26, 2009 12:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
This plan is clearly wasteful. As you can see it creates three different government departments each named confusingly "Higher Prices" which are apparently in charge of families, farmers, and drivers.
I propose we merge these into the Dept. of Lost Jobs and elevate it to a cabinet level agency or maybe put it under the DOL.
In other news, Republicans make poor charts which makes Cap and Trade legislation a bad idea.
Although, I guess this explains why their "budget" was only about 20 pages long. I'm sure they double spaced it and made the margins really big too.
June 26, 2009 4:23 PM | Reply | Permalink
Does his aide tie his shoes for him? No, wait, he probably does have his aide tie his shoes for him.
eewwwww!
June 26, 2009 5:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Boehner has done us all a favor, and created a chart that specifies not only the quantity of his stupidity, but also the exact manner of it. I bet he stayed up all night working on it!
June 27, 2009 7:08 PM | Reply | Permalink